Thursday, December 22, 2011

How Did This Happen?!

Christmas is in 3 days!! What the?!  Where did 2011 go?? I still have yet to finish getting presents for everyone. Yikes. (Or, as they would say in Scooby Doo,  Zoinks!) And today it just hit me...I am going to be flying to Arizona in 9 days. 9. That's single digits. I'm not ready yet...I just got home =/
One of my friends asked me the other day what I was most nervous about...I suppose there are two answers to that. My ridiculous answer? I'm a very confident, loud, outgoing person...but sometimes my inner 5 year old worries...What if I don't fit in? What if they don't like me? I know, I know, *sob sob.* But really, am I the only one who feels that way? I don't think so.
The other thing that makes me nervous is that I don't really know why I'm going. I just have prayed about it a lot and feel like that's what I should be doing. I mean, I know why I'm going logistically, but I don't know Heavenly Father's reasons. I may not know until I get there, I may not know for years after. Yet, I still wonder.
 Am I going to gain more independence?
 Am I going to prepare myself for motherhood? 
Am I going to meet someone?
 Am I going to save up money to go on a mission?
 I just don't know. Maybe all of the above. 
By the way...did I tell you I was considering going on a mission? I might. =) I mean, I'm very strongly considering it. We'll see what I learn from Arizona. I'm just givin' ya'll a heads's a very good possibility that I may not be writing on here for 18 months come next fall. Who knows? Not me. Lots of hardcore praying is in store for this girl.


tiny dancer said...

LOL I totally agree with you - I seriously can't comprehend what happened to 2011! I had a giantic year (graduated from my masters, got a fellowship, turned 25?! OMGGGG). It's crazy - I hope 2012 slows down a little bit for us :P

Hope you have a happy holiday season <3

abbypauna said...

A MISSION! woahhhh what is this news, this is AMAZO. Skype date ASAP...after christmas and all haha and you settle into arizona. Don't worry I get like that too, BUT you are amazing and such a wonderful person everyone will love you, just don't forget about us!! Love ya girl and you will do great.
p.s hope you have a great christmas xx

Dearest Lou said...

I hope you got all of your Christmas shopping done. We were just in Las Vegas for our honeymoon and the weather down there is so lovely it's freaking cold in Utah right now :P I hope you had a lovely Christmas and thanks for your sweet comment on my blog (: Good luck figuring out what to do about the mission, I couldn't personally imagine going on a mission but I really look up to those that do! <3

Lauren said...

i've been asking myself the same questions! its so hard deciding. there are so many options and i just don't know what would be best.